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A reader tasked me with an interesting challenge yesterday. He presented me with a template for an “Anime RPG Party”, curious as to who I would put where and why. I told him that not only would I take him up on his challenge, I would impose a limitation upon myself! I wouldn’t use the same anime twice! (Oh Tom, you bold, sexy man you.)

Here is the Blank Template

Now, it took me some serious thinking to get this thing filled, but I’m happy with the results. I present to you, my readers, the completed template!

The Assembled Party!

Now, it would certainly be no fun if I just tossed that image up on the nets and said “Well, there it is!” With that said, the who and why for each slot.

Hero: Gourry Gabriev, Swordsman of Light

Anime: Slayers

When I saw the “hero” blank, my first impulse was to put a chosen one anime child there. You know, the annoying brat with no ability to save his own ass that insists on helping every peasant on the way to the evil demon lord? Gourry was going to go into the fighter slot… but then I realized. Gourry makes an AMAZING chosen one in his own right! Hell, the man LOOKS like a “hero of legend”.

Who is Gourry Gabriev? Do I have to slap you? Gourry Gabriev is one of the two core main central characters of the anime Slayers and all its attractive offspring. He is a descendant of the legendary Swordsman of Light and carries his family’s legendary blade, The Sword of Light. At the first episode, we establish Gourry as a goodhearted guy who is extremely dense and extremely good at what he does. When he unleashes his legendary artifact, he is darn near unstoppable. He was my favorite character and, even in a happy, comedic anime like Slayers, that briefly caught up with him. Thank god for resurrection magic. ^_^

As the Hero, Gourry would be the chosen one. Likely, he would be sent to slay some sort of revived evil demon thingy that can only be slain by the Sword of Light. That saves us the “Go find the magic widget” part of the quest, now we just have to fight our way through the army of evil to GET to the big evil. Gourry isn’t a tactician, he isn’t a leader and he isn’t a paragon. He IS, however, an extremely skilled swordsman with a personality that is IMPOSSIBLE to hate. I can see him pulling in party members, just out of concern that the dark lord might be able to mislead him with a “Out to Lunch, Back in 30 mins” sign.

Useless Princess: Princess Serentity

Anime: Sailor Moon

It was actually sort of hard to find a truly useless princess. I mean, most of them have some sort of magic… or connections… or the ability to inspire men. Princess Serenity has the ability to breathe in space. Don’t kid yourself, that’s it. That is all she has. Everything else comes from magic items that she might or might not be carrying in a “kidnap and rescue” or “please take me too” situation.

Princess Serenity was the original incarnation of Sailor Moon, back when there were magical space colonies on all the major celestial bodies and Mary Sues on all the minor ones. She was told not to go down to Earth because it might be dangerous. She did anyways. She met the Prince of Earth (or was it Tennis…) and the two of them fell in love. Then an evil woman came and killed him. In the manga, she committed suicide, in the anime she got murdered too.

Now, if you place her in our RPG crossover world… darn, isn’t she useless! If you have ever played an RPG game in which they force a useless character on you, there are two things that you NEVER EVER want that character to do: do things you tell them not to do. Get themselves killed. Guess what? Those appear to be Princess Serenity’s Strengths. I can see her absentmindedly touching things IMMEDIATELY after being told not to, causing traps to come out and almost kill the entire party. She will be lucky if she survives the entire thing, but I doubt Gourry will let her die, either way. He is, after all, legendary and extremely skilled. He also has experience with incompetent princesses. (This one can’t even Rah Tilt!)

Black Mage: Dark Schnider

Anime: Bastard!!

Every party needs an evil character! A guy who is working for the personal good by working for the common good! I mean, what better way to further your plans for world conquest than proving to the world that you are stronger than the guy fated to conquer it? Darsh was the first character I dropped in and I did it without a moment’s hesitation.

Dark Schnider is the sorcerer who almost conquered the world. He was tricked by a cleric and his soul was sealed inside a baby. Now, years later, he is called forth in order to defend their kingdom of Meta-Licana (Metalica) from his former underlings. He knows ONLY utility and fire spells, but his fire spells are awesome enough to kill fire elementals.

In the party, Darsh would be the evil conscience. Not one to be taken over by pity or righteous fury, he would be able to offer his crafty alternatives to the party. Gourry isn’t the brightest, Darsh helps to cover for him. By “cover”, I mean manipulate. I bet HE wants the sword of light, too!

Healer: Melissa, Priestess of Mylee, God of War

Anime: Mahou Senshi Louie

When I thought of healers, I thought of Melissa. The funny thing is the amazing similarities between Louie and Gourry… Louie has more muscle mass. Either way, Melissa fits in perfectly as the party’s only (competent) female member. She doesn’t WANT to be here, but her god wills it. (This is against my will. This is against my will. This is against my will.)

Melissa was one third of a badass all-female adventuring party in her series. When the time came, she underwent a ritual in which Mylee would reveal to her her Divine Champion. This would be an amazing hero that she would support and guide to greatness. High Priestess Jenny’s Divine Champion was the commoner warrior who later became their just and wise king. Melissa’s was a face-punching wizard who can barely cast anything.

We can easily swap out Louie for Gourry. That brings the Lucrene hammer of Mylee into our party. Melissa knows all the traditional clerical stuff, healing, light, undead-hurting stuff. Furthermore, she provides a sort of common sense attitude. She will try to keep the party on the straight and narrow and, all though it won’t help in their quest any, she would probably end up falling for the big lug by the end of the adventure. (High Priestess Jenny: “Why don’t you sleep with him, Melissa? How can you share your Divine Champion’s feelings if you can’t even share his bed?”)

Knight: Gan Fall

Anime: One Piece

Oh, the knight slot. This is where I ran into trouble. You see, the only knights I could think of were both from Record of Lodoss War and neither fit in with the party really well. Parn was more of a Hero slot guy than a Knight slot one anyways and Lord Ashram is too sexy to be an underling. I wanted a brave defender in heavy armor! Then I remembered Gan Fall.

Gan Fall used to be God in the One Piece world. (Check the beard, you know it to be true.) Ah, but in the One Piece world, God is the title given to the king of Skypiea, an island made of clouds where the residents have wings. Either way, he has been disposed and now he wanders the skys as Gan Fall, the sky knight. Atop his mighty pegasus, Pierre, he saves lives and upholds honor.

This guy is perfect for our hypothetical RPG kingdom’s knight captain. An older veteran who doesn’t know the meaning of retire, he can’t sit idly by and grow vegetables while the world is in danger and the useless princess needs saving! Gan fall would don his armor and take up his mighty lance to support the hero. In true One Piece style, expect him to hurl himself at an enemy he can’t beat, get knocked aside and badly wounded, but manage to pull through.

Fighter: Gutz

Anime: Berserk

Gutz was the guy who booted Goury from the fighter slot. I knew I needed a few more feet of steel in this party and when I thought of Gutz I knew he was in. The great part about Gutz is that, if you have watched the show, you have a good vision of him at any level. The first episode shows you high-level Gutz, the Black Swordsman. His sword is massive, he has the coolest arm crossbow/cannon since Trigun… the man is unstoppable. We probably want a younger Gutz though. One without a bad case of the Demons. (Maybe we can find him some on our quest!)

Gutz is a great fighter. He is all about the massive sword, but he shows the versatility and on-his-feet thinking necessary for a truly great party fighter. While both he and Gourry are swordsmen, there is a key difference in their styles. While Gourry is swinging a sword in a sword style… Gutz is adding momentum to a plane of steel. This isn’t a fighting style, it’s physics! Dodge that crap, don’t try to block it! I expect evil minion top-halves to be regularly sent flying. (They say even the horses get cut in half.)

Support: Lawrence Kraft

Anime: Spice and Wolf

What better form of support than financial? Lawrence is a merchant. He is the main character of a western fantasy anime ABOUT being a merchant in a western fantasy setting. He actually makes being a merchant interesting and, you know what? He is good at it. I can see him bringing his cart full of wares along with the party. They keep him safe, he keeps them supplied, fed and clothed. Heck, with his resourcefulness, they can even split a profit at the end of the journey! That being said… there isn’t too much more to say about him. While he was a really easy pick for me, he is one of the harder ones to discuss.

Rogue: Woodchuck

Anime: Record of Lodoss War

Wood is an iconic rogue from an iconic series. He was his party’s rogue there, too. Try looking for a traditional western fantasy rogue, I dare you. I found two, one was Wood. I don’t mind, though, he fits in just fine and, after all, he was my favorite character.

Woodchuck was a thief that the Lodoss party met during a brief stint in jail. He befriended the main character and decided that lowlifes can have friends too. So, when they all got out of jail shortly thereafter, Wood decided to go with the group on their quest. Poor bastard. He did all the right rogue things, he was crafty, backstabby, sneaky, trap… search… y… yet in the end he got his mind dominated by an evil artifact and walked away into the night. When next we see the artifact, shes switched over to a female body and discarded Wood. Poor Wood.

Wood would do good as a hood should *slaps self* he join up with this party as well. Could Wood *slaps self* survive this outing though? It depends on whether or not the demon will possess a new body if its old one is destroyed. Sadly, Wood is a magnet for that sort of crap. If he had been traveling with the warrior from the game Diablo, that warrior would have probably stabbed Wood with the evil gem rather than himself. Luckily, Gutz is here too! Maybe Gutz would get possessed instead. (At least Wood would have a good shot)

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4 Comments

  1. And I shall give you a party, The likes of which has NEVER BEEN SEEN.

  2. Of course next we need the 5 person team, range and melee dps, tank, mage, ganker? What’s the right lineup?

    • OF COURSE WE CAN FILL ALL OF THOSE WITH BLEACH! ISHIDA IS RANGE, ICHIGO IS MELEE, CHAD IS TANK, ORIHIME IS MAGE AND RENJI CAN JUNGLE/GANK LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOL.

      God, I hate myself for typing that.

        • Jordan
        • Posted September 12, 2010 at 1:26 am
        • Permalink

        You should be ashamed of yourself…


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